by Stony1205
Original Idea by Charles J. Sykes
Unfortunately, there are some things that psychics should already know, but don't. Not all of them have to do with psionics. As a modest wake up call, here are some basic rules that may not have found their way into standard curriculum.
-Rule No. 1- Life is not fair. Get used to it.
The average teenager (which is also the average age for members at PsiOnline) uses the phrase "It's not fair." 8.6 times a day. You got it from other members or your parents, who said it so often you decided they must be the most idealistic person ever. When they started hearing it from others, they realized rule No. 1.
-Rule No. 2- PsiOnline doesn't care about your self-esteem as much as your school does.
We expect you to accomplish something before you feel good about yourself. This may come as a shock. Usually, when inflated self-esteem meets reality, members complain that it's not fair. (See Rule No. 1.)
-Rule No. 3.- Sorry, you won't get it the first time through.
And you won't be able to lift that knife or be able to flare either. You may even have to do this strange phenomenon called "practice"!
-Rule No. 4.- If you think the mods are tough, wait until you get a boss.
He doesn't have a tenure, so he tends to be a bit edgier. When you screw up, he's not going to ask you how you feel about it. So quit your complaining, you've got it good here at PsiOnline.
-Rule No. 5.- Listing to a newbie's ideas or difficulties is not below your dignity.
The senior members have a different phrase for a newbie's difficulties. It's called "Help and Respect". They weren't embarrassed to listen to someone who may not be as good as them. They would be embarrassed to make an ass of themselves and PsiOnline by making rude remarks to those who are smart enough to ask for help.
-Rule No. 6.- It's not the Moderator's fault.
If you screw up, you are responsible. We aren't here to clean your messes. This is the flip side of "It's my life," and "You're not the boss of me," and other proclamations of your generation. When you do something not advised, it's on your dime. Don't whine or you'll eventually get a `ban line.
-Rule No. 7.- We weren't as irritable before the idiots came to enlighten us.
We got this way by dealing with morons, deleting our countless amounts of spam, banning radicals and DBZ'ers, and having an overall hard time... Oh, and by the way, before you proclaim yourself "God's gift to psychics" take the time to read the articles. Let me give you a quote, "I am better than all of you put together!" *Later* "How do u make a psyball?"
-Rule No. 8.- Your school may have done away with winners and losers. Life and PsiOnline have not.
In some schools, they'll give you as many times as you want to get the right answer. Failing grades have been abolished and class valedictorians have been scrapped, lest anyone's feelings get hurt. Effort is as important as results I suppose. This of course, bears not the slightest resemblance to anything in real life. Here at PsiOnline you can only make an ass of yourself so many times... (See rules 1,2, and 4)
-Rule No. 9.- Life is not divided into semesters, and you don't get summers off.
Not even Easter break. They expect you to show up everyday. For eight hours. And you don't get a new life every 10 weeks. It just goes on and on. While we're at it, I'd like to stress this: Very few psionics sites (Including PsiOnline) are interested in fostering your self-expression or helping you find yourself. Fewer still lead to self-realization. Do that on your time, and don't waste ours. Truth is, we don't give a damn about your welfare. (See rules 1 and 2)
-Rule No. 10- Television is not real life.
Nobody here can stress this enough I suppose. If it isn't DBZ it's X-Men. Your life is not a sitcom or anime. Your problems will not be solved in 30 minutes, and you don't master a skill in 60. In real life --Now this is a shocker!-- people actually have to get off their buts and do something! OMG!! Nobody is as perky or pliable as Jennifer Aniston. Also on a side note you cannot blow anything up with psiballs, so please drop the subject whilst you still have some pride.
-Rule No. 11- Be nice to newbies.
They may be new today, but they may just show you up tomorrow.
-Rule No. 12- Bragging about your psychic powers does not make you cool.
Next time your out cruising, watch a pack of 5 year olds acting like they're goku. Well, that's what you look like to skeptics and non-psychics when you claim that you have amazing psychic abilities. Ditto for "expressing your inner power" when you join a cult.
-Rule No. 13- You are not immortal, nor are you god's gift to psychics.
If you are under the impression that living fast, dying young, and leaving a beautiful corpse is romantic or glory full, you obviously haven't seen one of your peers at room temperature lately. Going around thinking that you are "somebody" and using TK all day will end up with you having a liver thermometer. (For those of you who are lost, you'll end up dead thinking you can preform psionics all day.)
-Rule No. 14- Enjoy this time while you can.
Sure, practicing is a pain, school's a bore, and life is depressing. But someday, when you've accomplished much, and are well known at PsiOnline, you'll realize how wonderful it was to be a newbie. Maybe you should start now.
You're Welcome
Labels: Rants